How do you deal with homesickness on long contracts?

After 22 years at sea, I still find that the first two weeks of every contract are the hardest. Missing birthdays, anniversaries, and just the daily routine with family never gets easier.

Things that help me:
- Video calls every evening when possible
- Keeping busy with hobbies (I read a lot)
- Maintaining a workout routine
- Counting down the days helps some people but I find it makes it worse

What are your coping strategies? Especially interested to hear from those with young children.

574 views 5 replies

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Rajesh Kumar Chief Officer

1 years ago

#1

The best advice I can give: stay busy. An idle mind at sea is your worst enemy. I maintain a strict daily routine - gym, study for next certificate, work, video call home, read. When I first went to sea 12 years ago there were no video calls. Letters took weeks. At least now we can see our families daily on most vessels.

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Vikram Singh Chief Officer

1 years ago

#2

I have two kids under 10 and yes, it's brutal. What helps me is being very present when I'm home - no scrolling phone, no being mentally absent. My kids know that daddy goes to work on a ship but he always comes back. We do countdown calendars together before I leave. The worst part is hearing them cry on the phone.

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Maria Santos Second Engineer

1 years ago

#3

Filipino culture has a saying: "Para sa pamilya" - for the family. We sacrifice time with our families so they can have a better life. It doesn't make the homesickness easier but it gives it purpose. I send my kids to good schools because of this career. That helps me push through the hard days.

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Mehmet Yilmaz Chief Officer

1 years ago

#4

I find that the first contract is always hardest. After that your family adjusts and you develop coping mechanisms. But I will say - if your company provides good internet, it makes a HUGE difference. I switched from a company with 50kbps to one with proper VSAT and my quality of life onboard improved dramatically.

Anonymous

1 years ago

#5

Not going to lie, I cried in my cabin on my first contract. I was 21, fresh from academy, and suddenly alone on a ship with strangers for 8 months. It gets easier. Now on my 6th contract it's just part of life. But please, companies: give us decent internet. It's 2025.